Queer and Dating outside your Race/Culture

     Ive been thinking and I don't know if It's me or everyone else. Ive been trying my hardest to collect my thoughts about everything. And Im just going to flat out say how I feel. Being queer, Black and educated, its hard to find someone of my race as equivalently educated as me to date. Struggling to find someone in your culture to be with was not a fear until now. Seeing how "black love" is suppose to be my love get out of jail card. For years Imagining that I would be able to support my culture. But when you start to struggle with something your limits become limitless and you start to think new things. However  this didn't just start from me "feeling"some type of way. I think trauma has a lot to do with our choices. Sometimes stemming from the lack of a father or black father figure in your life, men who have been horrible examples in your mothers life, or simply being verbally abused by men and women in our lives. I have been through it all. And I'm not ashamed to speak from a hurt or trauma because I can help someone else think this through. The fear of the treatment that I have experienced or seen has changed how I perceive things. I mean, Im not saying you cant find someone of the same race or culture to love and meet you equally... it just hasn't happened...yet. I haven't lost hope completely, but I have started to look at other options. Dating someone who is white, latin, middle eastern, hispanic or asian has always been a topic of priority for me. Diversifying your pallet allows one to understand how the world works. Its like traveling in your city. You start to see and understand things you never have before. Note, I also have had someone who was or who I thought was equally on the same IQ / relationship page as me...but honestly, many times it could just be the equal sex. Most of the times what people need is to be fed emotionally more than physically. When someone goes outside of their norm, they tend to expand their consciousness. I guess what I'm trying to say is, when your dreams aren't looking to dreamy you have to start looking at something else. And Honestly , its not about race or culture. Its about finding someone to love and relate to. Its about looking for someone who you can actually love and have a real conversation with everyday. I and anyone else doesn't want to be the teacher or the person who provides the stimulating conversation everyday. You want the equal opportunity to be able to get to know one another on the same page. Not everyone will be on the same page everyday as everyone has differences, yet I still want to have longevity and know that what "THIS" me and your future spouse calls love or a relationship will forever be love in the relationship. I... hope that everyone can find what their dream is...but I also know that as an adult, its best to unlearn to relearn and pick new options. Im open to whatever queer possibility there is. Even being in school, I find that it's easier for me to expand my palette and open my mind to loving something new. I can't continue to live in hurt, I can't continue to allow myself too long for unrealistic things, I can't continue to hide from the truth thats being revealed to me everyday. I am open and so should my community. To all my queer and black American readers, Are you open for any new love adventurous? Are you sticking to one script or are you ready to evolve? How do you see yourself in the next 5 years? Will you like what you like in the future? 

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